**LEBRON JAMES IS SATAN** you ever actually *looked* at LeBron’s eyes?? I mean really LOOKED?? cold. calculating. ancient. that’s not a basketball player. that’s a cosmic entity wearing a compression sleeve. he calls himself the *King*. KING OF WHAT??? EARTH??? SOULS??? THE WESTERN CONFERENCE???? and explain this to me — how is he STILL DUNKING at 39?? that’s not “athleticism.” that’s *dark power*. man drinks stem cells and eats sunlight. I saw a clip where he sprinted 94 feet in 3 seconds. THREE. SECONDS. that’s FLASH LEVEL. that’s DEMON SPEED. remember when he threw that chalk in the air before games?? that’s not chalk. THAT’S ASH. he's *summoning* something. every pregame ritual is a portal opening. his jersey? 6. Miami? 6. Changed back to 6. that’s not a number — that’s a SIGNAL. **6 6 6** and don’t even get me STARTED on the Taco Tuesday thing. it’s not about tacos. it’s about distraction. while you’re laughing at him yelling "TACO TUESDAY" he’s whispering incantations into the beans. that’s *ritual food*. that’s CULT BEHAVIOR. he’s friends with Jay-Z Jay-Z is friends with Beyoncé Beyoncé is Sasha Fierce Sasha Fierce is a spirit SPIRITS = POSSESSION POSSESSION = NBA FINALS look me in the eye and tell me that 2016 Finals block wasn’t **supernatural** he came from the sky like a *falling angel* hmmmmm???? I’m not saying he made a deal with the devil. I’m saying he *is* the devil, and the NBA is just a very elaborate end-times prophecy playing out in hi-def WAKE UP.
GRTZ2! GRTZ2! (April 11, 2025, 11:36 p.m.)
no. just no. lebron is NOT satan. never, ever, say such foolish things again. "An angel makes itself look scary to ward away evil, a demon makes itself look beautiful to deceive humans"
LogicalPoopSockFan1994 (April 11, 2025, 11:40 p.m.)
You child. Lebron is not "satan". He is a lizardman.